There is a trend now where people who are into magic are now claiming to be empaths and psychics. These people usually define their ’empathic’ skills in a way attaches value and bias to the emotions they claim to feel, feeding into the Positivity Culture Machine. Most people who claim to be an empath “feel” and “see” their version of good and positive values for people they like or who admire them, while placing negative values on events and people they don’t like. This article is going to discuss the difference between empathy and being empathic, and should clear away any confusion.
The community, especially in the last five years, has been flooded with many people that think they have special talents and gifts they do not actually possess. Many of the newer practitioners especially like to brag about being able to do everything. I can tell you now, even after discipline and training, there are still things I can’t do or that I am not good at. The biggest trend that most practitioners have grabbed onto is being an empath.
I think what people don’t understand is that showing empathy, which is the ability to understand what a person is experiencing, is much different than an empath. An empath directly experiences what the other person is currently going through – as if they were that person. It’s not “knowing” someone is in pain or their emotional state, but “feeling” it as they do. You are essentially transferring their emotions and physical pain into yourself. This is why I place true empaths under the category of a psychic vampire – they are taking in the person’s energy, whether it is consensual or not.
Also, empathy is usually learned. Being empathic is not learned; it is a direct connection to another person, being, or object. It is not understanding, it is knowing through direct experience.
For example, since I can remember, I have been able to feel what others felt. I generally know when someone is having a bad day, even if they are laughing and smiling. Many times I can tell who is an abuser, even if everyone else loves the person and there are no outward signs (usually it comes to light later). I can sit next to someone and know where they have pain, and what type. This transference of emotion and mental states is tiring and does acerbate my own problems. It’s not fun. I have had to developed shields in order to keep most of it from distracting me, because of it’s intensity. Unless I am invested in a relationship with a person, I won’t go out of my way to use my gifts. This is because it would mean that I would have to be open to real mental and physical anguish while working. This is also why I don’t “sell” my services regarding healing – it creates a link to physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual anguish. Also, anytime an empath uses their gifts, they make a connection, and we have a bad habit of getting entangled in people’s personal lives thereafter.
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Empathy Does Not Equate to Love
The biggest falsity regarding being empathic is the idea that a true empath loves everything. The reasoning behind this is the premise if you understand it, then you cannot judge it. This cultivates the thought that everyone and everything needs to be loved the way the “empath” views love. This may lead to shaming of others who understand that the world is not made of Love and Light. It is good to have hope and do what you can to be happy – it is detrimental to deny events and feelings that are uncomfortable.
I also think one of the greatest disservices that Positivity Culture has created is the falsity that love is the answer to everything – and true enlightenment means that you must love and understand everything. This is not true. Once you experience what most people think and feel, and how it’s effected everything around them, you may understand them. However, that doesn’t mean that you love them – or that you even want to be around them. Most people have emotions that are shallow and completely uncontrolled. I have rarely met an actual person that loves other people, for example.
Let me explain by what I mean people rarely feel love. As an empath, this is how I experienced other people’s self-proclaimed love; possession, admiration, greed, wanting to be the ‘number one’ person in everyone’s lives, narcissism, longing to be loved and important, loyalty, friendship, desperation, lust, etc. Rarely have I felt people truly love. Those that cry out that love is the universal law have a deep longing to fit in and want others to admire and love them. Many are parroting the words, and I feel their disgust towards the people they direct the phrase towards. It’s why I get a stomachache when I hear people give any type of blessing or ‘positivity’ phrase – being an empath I can physically feel lies and the emotions behind it.
This may be a big reason why people who directly experience others are actually more likely to be grumpy and want to be secluded. When you can directly know the feelings and motives of people, the world becomes tiresome and sickening. You may even be able to feel the sickness, not only in humans, but the Earth itself. It doesn’t go away; it is all the time and bleeds into dreams and waking life.
Empaths also have their own systems for knowing truth, and it always involves physical feelings. This is not a “knowing”, or an observation of body language, or even “feeling energy”; it is a direct experience. For me, I have a spectrum of pain when experiencing another person lying. Here is an example of what I mean by having a direct experience of emotion and intent. If someone is knowingly lying, especially for manipulation, to me it feels like a constant stabbing in my heart or solar plexus (depending on what they are lying about). If someone is lying about how they feel about another person, I will either feel emptiness or whatever real emotion that person has towards the one they claim to have positive feelings for. If a person is lying, but isn’t aware, I usually feel a dull ache in my heart. It is different for every empath, but it is a physical feeling versus mental knowing.
This is also how I know if a person is lying about what they are, or can do. I also know which people really believe it; and which ones know they are charlatans, but are looking to profit or be famous.
It is benevolent to have empathy and try to understand people. It is a great goal to want to make the world a better place based on your own personal experience. However, unless you actually experience others as you would your own self, you are not a empath.
Stay true to yourself, and Hail Self!
Arachnia Stoneskull
Photo Credit: alphacoders.com/835/835418.jpg
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